So, you’re making out on a regular basis with a gorgeous girl that can’t get enough of your time. There’s no commitment, you’re still free to roam and you have no-strings-attached sex on tap. Good, right?
However, after you have been intimate with a woman on a regular basis, you may notice subtle relationship tendencies begin to rear their heads. Beware, many of these signs can pile up on you overnight and may be the only indicator that you are sliding head first into relationship quicksand.
Word to the wise: Don’t bolt before gathering hard evidence. You don’t want to scare away an awesome sex-buddy for no good reason, that’s plain stupid. Just keep your eyes open, your senses keen and stay on your toes — you’re fighting for your independence out there, gentlemen.
Meeting the family/friends: When a girl arranges requests or suggests meeting her parents, you have clearly left her bedroom and walked into her life. If there is a way out, then dammit man, get out. But if you’re locked in, just get through as best you can by sticking to conversations about weather, current events and family pets. Don’t crack jokes and avoid discussing politics, money or religion.
The Toothbrush Syndrome: Admire a girl for her practicality when she brings a tooth brush to your house. Fear the girl who leaves one behind, for she has begun moving in and this is her first little suitcase.
One way to solve this problem is to carry the offending toothbrush around in your pocket and next time you see her, give it back. Play the dumb-guy card and say: “I thought you might need it.” Repeat when necessary
Staring at You Lovingly: She’s looking at you with puppy-dog eyes and her head tilted to one side, there’s an excellent chance that sex is not on her mind. She may look docile enough, but as she sits there staring at you, all her unnecessary bodily functions are shutting down so that she can focus all her energy on falling in love with you. While she is in this trance-like state, get up slowly and back out of the room.
The “we look good together” card: This is not the language of friends with benefits. This woman is fantasizing about a world in which the two of you are together and happy. It’s sickening. It’s like catching her masturbating over a wedding magazine.
There’s the outside possibility that it could be a casual remark, maybe the two of you do look good together. Keep your Spidey-sense on high alert though; these four words have been known to act as a gateway drug to a much more serious relationship.
Less Emphasis on Sex: In a casual relationship, quality time is made up of pillow talk and those brief moments before you have sex, when you say hello, nice to see you. If she’s booking cultural events or holiday time with you months in advance, she is projecting into the future and putting you there.
You are now in a situation that is far from casual and have been led there under false pretenses. You sent away a comic book coupon for sea monkeys and got back an envelope of crack cocaine. It’s not your fault. Walk away.
Dropping the “Boyfriend word”: Sure, once or twice is OK, a mistake, a slip of the tongue, etc. However, if dropping the word "boyfriend" seems deliberate or if it happens too often, then you have yourself a problem.
The trick with this trap is that if you confront the situation, you invite the inevitable question of “So, why aren’t we in a relationship, then?” Let it slide but keep score. If she drops too many B-bombs, you need to light a fire and get out of there.