Modern Dating And The Harsh Truths Associated With It

Dating is a part of human mating process whereby two people meet socially for companionship beyond the level of friendship.

Modern dating is complicated in every aspect of the can be everything and nothing at all at the same time. It can be in all forms from traditionally ways of going out to texting, online dating especially common on social media like Facebook.

Modern dating has such harsh realities that we live with because it’s actually true but it’s a matter of rolling with the flow, such realities include the following;

1. People lie (this is on both sides).

It’s plain and simple that however much people appear to be honest, there is always a lie along the way and if you don’t hear it directly, you will find out along the way as you find the truth for yourself which is far better than words.

We all lie, it could be white lies, big lies but the bigger the lie the more likely you are to date someone with a much bigger lie. To avoid this, date less and establish intimacy with a few chosen people you want to get to know. That level of comfort will make you more open and honest.

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2. Texting means you are low on the priority list.

Texting is the in thing in modern dating but it’s all for the worst since it builds fantasies and false hopes and misunderstandings that complicate communication. It’s more meaningful to hear his voice over the phone or meet in person.

3. People have got issues.

Everyone has got something or a bad side they may not admit freely .it’s always fair to meet someone who knows their dark side because most likely the person will be more compassionate when you show your own dark side.

4. Disappointment will always be there.

If we can disappoint ourselves every now and often, then expect disappointment from other people and therefore one has to learn to live with frustrations. If you keep dumping whoever disappoints you then you will never find anyone.

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5. You will have to change.

They say change is constant. When you are dating someone, they may dig up all your bad qualities but you shouldn’t take it the bad way since it only helps you grow and accept parts of your personality you may have ignored .if you are dating a party animal who loves the night life, you may have to adjust and find yourself adapting to such a lifestyle change which may eventually change your quality of life.

6. You are not the only one they are dating.

Knowing that the person you are dating could be dating other people is good for the sake of peace of mind. Keep dating this person since it’s all a game and who knows you may become exclusive and the chosen one.


7. Stop being ‘all nice ‘and ‘perfect’.

When you are dating someone, it’s better if you express yourself and needs whether he or she likes it or not. Being a yes man won’t make dating any easy and it’s not cool since you can’t say out what you have in mind hence being lonely.

8. Unconditional love is earned, it’s not automatic.

Unconditional love is earned through time, some hardships and problem solving, nothing happens automatically. You need to feel confident in someone’s loyalty to you and that is rare to find.

9. You will never fully know someone.

There is always a side to someone he or she keeps from the world, no matter how long the dating period takes, you will never know everything, it takes time and people always change along the way. Get to know yourself first and trust yourself to make the right decisions and let other people count for themselves.

10. If you are not a top priority, your invitation to spend time together will be a ‘maybe’.

For someone who has you as a top priority, they will always make an effort to set up the dates because it indicates that he really has interest in you. For someone who says ‘maybe’, it means they are not even sure of their intentions for you.

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11. The person who cares less has all the power.

This is difficult when you are head over heels for someone, after some time of dating and you care a lot and you want the other person to know, forget makes you appear less valuable .However much you like someone a lot, it’s better not to show how much you care about the other person since it can be mistaken for being desperate.

12. People want people others may also be interested.     

Scarcity is part of human nature, don’t make yourself too available or an over sharer. Let the other person set the pace until you both find balance, it’s only natural for her to feel you slipping away, and want you back.  



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Asaba James and Twinomujuni Deborah via mikolo