While planning her wedding:
1. “OMG! You’re already engaged? But you barely know each other.” They might have just met, and you could have her best interest at heart, but at this point you need just to support her. A wedding always starts with two people in love wanting to spend a lifetime together, even if it doesn’t last forever.
2. “I’m going to be so broke from your wedding.” The bride is completely aware of how much this wedding is costing and the added expenses of attending or standing by her side. I am sure she will understand if it is just completely unrealistic for you to attend, although she wishes you could. Either way, decide to come or not, but never complain about the cost in hopes of just making her feel guilty.
3. “Are you sure you want that to be your color palette?” Yellow might not be your favorite color, but maybe it has a special meaning to her that you know nothing about. The color palette should reflect the bride and is something she feels personally connected to, so just go with it.
4. “That’s your dress? I guess it’s nice.” One of the worst things you could ever say — hands down! A bride picks a dress she emotionally connects with so she may take it personally if you question her taste. Follow the adage ‘if you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all,’ comment on something else, or ask about her veil.
5. “You spent how much on that?” As much as you would never spend X amount on flowers, maybe they have a special meaning to her, or they are her one splurge. As a wedding planner, my golden rule is that you cannot comment on how much is spent on any aspect of the wedding unless you are paying for it.
6. “You’re going to diet, right?” Discussing a woman’s weight is a major no-no on a regular day, so why would right before the wedding be any different?
7. “I heard that it’s supposed to be so hot/cold/rainy/snowy on your wedding day.” The bride has probably checked the weather multiple times a day leading up to her nuptials. However, there is only so much they can do, and they’ve accepted that they can’t control the forecast. Don’t make her any more concerned than she already is by mentioning it.
8. “You must be on a tight budget, huh?” Every wedding budget is different. Every bride is trying to do the absolute best they possibly can with their price range and it really just hurts their feelings when people comment about the financial cost of their affair.
On her wedding day:
9. “You look just like (insert name).” Although you think comparing your friend to someone is a huge compliment, she might not think it is. In this case it is just better to tell her how beautiful she is without referencing anyone else.
10. “Don’t panic but…” Any sentence on her wedding day that starts with this is a recipe for disaster! Just don’t — point blank.
11. “I thought you were kidding when you said (insert name or animal) was in your ceremony.” The ceremony is something so special to both the bride and groom, and although it might not make sense to you, it is perfect to them and you shouldn’t take away from that.
12. “I saw all of this on Pinterest!” These days, most brides use Pinterest as a planning resource, so of course they are going to find some great ideas on there that they want to include in their wedding day. However, they also want it to feel special and personal. So instead of saying this, why don’t you just mention what cute ideas you loved, specifically?
13. “How much did all of this cost?” The bride already knows too well how much money she spent on her wedding and reminding her on her wedding day is just not okay. It is safe to say that the best bet is to not reference the cost of anything throughout the planning process unless you are paying for it or directly asked.
14. “I thought you said you were losing weight before your wedding?”Again, just don’t say it. Maybe she did try to lose weight, and she’s super self-conscious about it.
15. “I know I promised that I would make a toast, but I didn’t have time to write anything.” If the bride has asked you to be a part of her wedding in any way, it is because you are special to her and for you to just ‘not have time’ is hurtful.
All of the tasks of planning a wedding on top of everyday life can be overwhelming, and the best thing you can do is be there for her. When she needs to vent (which she will) just listen and tell her it will all work out and be beautiful.
Tell us: What’s the craziest thing that someone said to you while you were planning your wedding or on the big day?